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| December 6 2001 Thursday It has been a really bad day. At school we learned all about heredity and on the way home a thought struck me - that, like my father, I would probably go bald at a very early age. Then I got to thinking about other things that he may have passed on to me through his genes, and whether one of these things might be a small dick. To find out I decided to ask my father how big his dick was. He wouldn't tell me! Can you believe that? And not only wouldn't he tell me, he was so mad at me for asking him that the trip to the doctors for wearing my mother's knickers on my head is back on! I've always been able to ask my mother anything, and usually she's never been able to tell me anything, but I decided to ask her how big my father's dick was anyway. Remembering that she had told me not to call a dick a dick I asked her how big my father's hampton was. She said:'Well it certainly isn't big enough to be called a hampton, about five inches.' When I asked her if it was as thick as a Pork Farms snack size pie she said she didn't know how thick a Pork Farms snack size pie was, but if it was anything like a Mini Melton Mowbray pork pie, then definitely not. So my dad has got a five inch dick which isn't as thick as a Pork Farms snack size pie. No wonder my mother always looks fed up! Chips and double cheese baconburger with a fried egg on top for tea again. Cleaned the rabbit hutches out. Yuk. |