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| January 14 2002 Monday My appreciation of cookery has gone up one hundred per cent. I'd never heard of Nigella Lawson! The teacher in our cookery class played a video of Nigella doing her cookery programme, 'Nigella Bites'. I bet she does. What a doll! She can bite my bottom any time she likes. And steam my potatoes. When the video ended the teacher told us to cook what Nigella had cooked, paying particular attention to the cooking time. Nobody knew what she'd cooked! We'd all been to busy gawping at Nigella, paying particular attention to her tits. What a pair of knockers! What a woman! When the lesson ended there was a madder rush for the lavvies than the day Liz Hurley walked past our school playground during the dinner break, and it certainly wasn't because we all wanted a crap I can tell you. My father asked me if I'd seen anything of his car foot pump. I said not very recently. Well I haven't. I'm due to see the psychiatrist again tomorrow. It's a complete waste of time but it gets me off school for a couple of hours so why should I care. |