Dear Air 2000

11 Longlands Rd STOCKPORT Cheshire SK12 3BL 5th May 1994 Ken Smith Managing Director Air 2000 Ltd Oakfield Broadfield Park Brighton Road CRAWLEY West Sussex RH11 9RT           Dear Mr Smith Reference your letter dated April 26th.           I find it extraordinary that you find it extraordinary that any airline would offer a passenger a free flight simply to sample their on-board refreshments. But then I am a generous man, and, as it has now transpired, Air 2000 is not a generous airline. Despite giving me a Mint Imperial both ways. But to your lasagne. I am afraid I have some rather bad news for you. There is a good chance that it might not be as popular with your passengers as I may have led you to believe. Since opening my correspondence with Air 2000 five friends of mine to whom I recommended your airline have flown with you. Three of them have reported back on the lasagne thus:- One of them said it was the most revolting dish that he had ever had put in front of him. (And this man has suffered HM Forces and HM Prison food.) One of them said "I wouldn't give it to a dog. Not just because it was bad, but also lest the aggrieved cur took its revenge on me by biting me, which there is a very good chance it would." One of them said that it was 'Shit', which isn't perhaps as eloquent a condemnation as the previous one, but is no less devastating for all that. So it is a case of one man's meat I suppose. Perhaps the three people in question don't have the advantage of my educated palate, and maybe if, like me, they dined regularly at McDonalds and Kentucky Fried Chicken they would know what good food tasted like. By the way you have still to send me the recipe for your lasagne. After disappointing me with regard to your generosity I think it is the very least you can do. Yours sincerely T Ravenscroft (Mr)