Oyford Encyclopedia

An encyclopedia can be an extremely useful thing to have around the house - certainly more useful than a chocolate teapot or an Australian au pair girl on crack. However encyclopedias do tend to be a little on the dull side when discharging their information. The Oyford Encyclopedia is an attempt to put this right. For example if you look up Line Dancing in the Encyclopedia Britannica you will see the entry 'A dance performed by a group, usually in single file and in ranks, in which they perform a particular set of steps in unison'. Whereas the Oyford Encyclopedia defines Line Dancing as 'A popular pastime imported from the United States, it is a sort of Country & Western formation dance. The dancers, who form up in columns and rows, have cowboy hats, cowboy boots, and an IQ of under 40, although only the latter is compulsory.' Then take the Encyclopedia Britannica's entry for Balaclava Helmet. - 'A knit cap for the head and neck first used in the Crimean War'. True of course, but a bit sparse on detail to say the least. The Oyford Encyclopedia is much more informative, its compilers obviously having researched the item more thoroughly. The entry reads - 'Balaclava Helmet - A tight-fitting woollen helmet-like covering for the head and neck, originally worn by soldiers on active service in the Crimea. When the Balaclava Helmet was first introduced there were heavy casualties and it was very much disliked, but then someone had the idea of cutting a hole in the front of it so the wearer could see where he was going'. Then again most encyclopedias with pretensions to worthiness don't carry an entry for the Spice Girls, whereas the Oyford Encyclopedia does. But only to take the piss out of them of course.